I'm trying to keep my business, my triplets, and my waistline under control. I excel at one of those, fail at another one of those, and one is a work in progress. Which is which is day dependant.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree

Things I have in common with Jesus:

1. I'm Jewish.
2. I was born on December 25th.
3. I've been to Israel.
4. I quite like wearing Birkenstocks, even in cold weather.
5. I don't get my hair cut quite as often as I should.
6. I've got a mate named Mary who is a mother.
7. I've slept in a barn. On hay.
8. I know at least 3 wise men.
9. I don't mind a bit of sugar and spice and frankinsense and myrrh.
10. I enjoy wearing clothes which do not require ironing.

I've always wanted to celebrate Christmas. I love all those beautiful decorations, and the whole 'matchy matchy every year a new colour scheme' thing, and the handmade decorations kids make out of macaroni and string, and the carolling, and all the other commercialised shiny crap which comes along with modern Christmas. In short, many times in my life I really, really wanted to be able to buy trees and tinsel and baubles. Hell, I even love the WORD 'baubles.' I love how it kind of rolls off the tongue like that: bbbaawwwwbbbuuuhhlllssss. I love ALL the cheesy fibre optic, moving, singing, bell ringing, hip swaying, tinny-voiced decorations. If I was a Christmas celebrator, oh hell yes I'd have the fake snow. Even in Australia, where Christmas is a summer holiday. I would have CANS AND CANS AND CANS of that fake snow crap.

And can you imagine me with the lights?? I'd totally have one of those houses people drive by to see and need to wear sunglasses in order to not be blinded.

This week, I got my chance. The shop needs a Christmas display (one small table's worth), and I need to go and get a bunch of gorgeously Christmasssy stuff to put on the display. I wandered into ONE store today, just to gather some info on what the options were and what I might need to spend and what colour scheme I might like to go with.


There is literally TONS of stuff out there for the taking. TONS. And I love it all and I want it all and the business can actually afford it...(not) all, but most of it.

The 2 metre fibre optic reindeer whose head moves from side to side.
The Santa figurine who sways his hips and rings his bell. He comes in 3 sizes!
The colour changing light box thingie which shows different Xmas themed images.
The bells. OHHHHHH the bells.
Did I mention the baubles? There are a LOT of baubles out there. Lots.
Tiny baubles the size of marbles.
Basketball sized baubles (seriously. Who knew??)
Stockings. Even stockings for DOGS.
A really really big inflatable snow globe which actually blows fake snow around.
(that's the one I liked the best. It blows snow around. FOR REAL.)

I'm pretty certain that when Biz Guy and I went through all the financials and budgets and projections and cash flows, there was no line item for "giant inflatable snow globe." (But I might double check that, just to be sure.)

Of course he *tried* to be all Biz Guy about it and ask me what the ROI was for all this crapola I wanted to buy, but I kindly ignored him.  This is one of those rare times when Biz Guy can take his logical, practical advice and shove it right where Santa does not dare to go. I was fully prepared to blow a sleigh load of money in that store today and feel not one skerrick of either Jewish or Catholic guilt about it.

BAUBLES. There were *thousands* of baubles.


I walked out of there with a bottle of water and a small bag of chocolate covered banana lollies...and not even one string of tinsel.

Not even the cute little Santa figurine which bobbed back and forth if you pushed it over with your finger.

Not even the itty bitty cutest baubles in the entire WORLD which were stripey. In different coloured stripes.

Not even the - SO DAMN CUTE I WILL DIE RIGHT NOW IF I DO NOT BUY IT - sparkly little table top Christmas tree which changed colours and SANG SONGS and other cool stuff.

I know, right? I wait 35 years to be let loose in the Christmas aisle...and I totally choke. Not sure what happened there, but at a guess I just got totally overwhelmed by sparkly glittery awesomeness, and my brain could not handle the adorable overload.

The Christmas display needs to be done this week. I've got 3 days to get this stuff sorted out.

Maybe I need to go the Jesus route and find me some disciples to help out.


Claire - Matching Pegs said...

Just call me your disciple, Claire ;-).

I think the most elegant displays limit colour, so you certainly have that right.

As someone raised as a fairly traditional Christian, I really don't like displays that go too far down the whole "Commercial Santa" path. I'm not anti "Father Christmas" (As he is always know in our house) - he stops at our house every year, but I don't like the way Christmas is all about consuming and presents.

I think you can't really go wrong with concentrating on a Christmas symbol like the Star. The Star is part of the real Christmas story, but is not overtly religious. You won't annoy anyone with a pretty star.

I would do masses of Stars and Baubles, in and around cakes and mixing bowls perhaps, and hanging down in the window.

Setting up a window display sounds just like my kind of fun, enjoy!

Cameron said...

We were on an airplane yesterday, and I was, as I always tend to do, browsing through the SkyMall catalog, and when I saw the Star of David tree topper, I immediately thought of you:


Who says you can't have it both ways.

Oh Hanukkah tree, oh Hanukkah tree
Thy leaves are so unchanging...

emzeegee & the hungry three said...

I love that comment "You won't annoy anyone with a star.." - Claire, you're hilarious. :) I have learned when dealing with the general public that almost anything can annoy almost anyone but maybe the humble star is above reproach. :)

And Cameron - BEST catalogue ever, right? I freakin' love that thing, because for those few hours, I find myself really *needing* a replica Captain's Chair from Star Trek, or garden lights which can operate on solar power and hide my house keys, too. :) Funnier still are the links to things other people who bought that item were interested in - who knew it was a "hyrbid holiday"??

Live and learn!