When You Know, You Know

Last night I had dinner out with a good friend who is in the beautiful, heady days of a new relationship. She is positively glowing from the inside out, and it's really wonderful to see just how sparkly she is. The way she spoke about her new partner was I'm sure the same way I spoke about to DH when I met him; with an almost incredulous aire that there could be someone who just fits so well. So she said things like..from their first date, it felt like they had been friends forever. Things like..although she has lived alone for a long time now, after having him over only a few times, the place suddenly felt very empty when he wasn't there. Things like...when he's hurting, she feels it, too. She then looked at me and said, "You know, what they say about these things is totally true. When you know, you know."

I could only smile at that one, especially since it's a line I've used many times before and she's always fobbed me off by retorting, "that's something only you 'smug marrieds' say!"

After she said it I started to think about how often in life that statement is true - there are so many things about which we know the answer, it just takes a while for us to acknowledge it. Or for us to come to terms with the fact that the answer is clear, we just might not like the answer! It occurs to me that it can apply to so many areas in our lives but also to those things which are positive and those which are not so positive. You might "know" that a relationship is ending long before it actually does - and that could apply personally as well as professionally. You might "know" that someone you've entrusted to do a job for you isn't doing the best they could or should be, but you'll hang onto them for a while. You might "know" that an opportunity seems to good to be true, but pursue it anyway. You might "know" that the seemingly inconsequential lump on your arm is something more sinister. You might just "know" that while everyone is fawning over the new girl, something you can't quite put your finger on is warning you that she's not quite what she seems. You might "know" that the house you just looked at is exactly the right one to buy.

When you know, you know. Intuition is such a wonderful gift, and yet how often we ignore it! Sometimes we listen to it, only to be influenced by other people - the ones who have enough influence to convince you to ignore that little inner voice. Sometimes we're unduly influenced by the strength of our intution - only to later on show that our intution was in fact dead wrong (rare, but it happens.) For my part, things happen to me all the time that cause me to then think, "You know, I KNEW this would be the outcome. I really shouldn't be surprised."  I suppose it's human nature which makes us carry on a course of action even though the little voice in our head is telling us not to. I'm pretty sure that's what made me pursue the business- I totally ignored the voice in my head telling me I was just a tiny bit insane to be attempting it.

Maybe the key is to work out when the little voice is inuition, and when the little voice is self-doubt - because I imagine there are times when they sound exactly the same, and times when either would send you into a course of action which then later turns out to be a bad idea.

I've clearly got a lot more thinking to do on this topic - but for now let me just say that hearing my friend use that expression strengthened my faith in intuition just that tiny bit...because, when it comes to matters of the heart, I totally believe that when you know, you know.