I'm trying to keep my business, my triplets, and my waistline under control. I excel at one of those, fail at another one of those, and one is a work in progress. Which is which is day dependant.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

On being brave

Isn't it interesting how one can be conditioned about what is 'normal' for work practices? Two things recently have me thinking about this. The first is the apprentice who left our company - she came from the public service, from a 9-to-5 job, weekends off, overtime paid, etc. Cooking (as a career) isn't like that - you get little money for way too many hours, on odd days and odd times, and you're often at the beck and call of a customer or owner. (Oh, and don't even think about having a head cold...wait, I already discussed that.) She essentially left because she couldn't get over that change in work practices - the fact that more money wasn't passed onto her, that the job often has to get done on the day (not pushed into an in-tray for tomorrow). The gap between what she had gotten used to and what she felt she deserved in this new arena was too much and she's decided to return to her previous career. The second thing making me think about this is my own desire to find a new, challenging position. I do like my job, and the people around me, but I'm very comfortable (eg bored) and am feeling antsy to try new things, learn new skills, and be out and about. The wierd thing is, it totally stresses me out to consider quitting without having another job lined up. There is no reason why it should stress me out at all - it's really normal in this industry, to have a couple of days/weeks/months between gigs and it doesn't really seem to bother anyone else. Me, however, it stresses out. It's like I think it's somehow more 'legit' if I resign because I have another job, rather than resigning just because, heck, I need some time off and I want to spend time considering my options. Is this because I, too, came from a 9-to-5 job, and therefore am conditioned to believe it's the 'normal' course of action? Is it because I have an over developed sense of responsibility? Is it because secretly I think I won't find something else, and will be stuck at home watching endless episodes of Days of Our Lives? Truly, I have no idea. The very thought of just saying, "Hey, I'm finishing in 2 weeks" without an answer to, "But where are you going?" fills me with anxiety. Hmmmm. Maybe I need to do exactly that just to realise that it's totally a normal, fine, non-stress-requiring thing to do. On the other hand, anyone know of any good pastry jobs?

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