I'm trying to keep my business, my triplets, and my waistline under control. I excel at one of those, fail at another one of those, and one is a work in progress. Which is which is day dependant.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Drama Drama Drama

My kids are not teenagers. They are barely event tweens, for cripes' sake. Yet with the magic of hormones, and being taller/bigger/etc than most of their peers, they are suddenly running headlong into teenager-ville. Or at least, their bodies are - and in DD2's case especially, their attitudes are as well.

I love my kids. I do. But I'm pretty sure that their teenagery-ness is going to drive me to drink. Or eat. Or...something. Because around here, EVERYTHING is suddenly a drama. Favourite jeans in the washing? DRAMA. Brother reading your book while you were at ballet class? DRAMA. Mum asking you to put away the milk and assorted breakfast stuff instead of leaving it out? DRAMA. It's a full half hour before you need to leave for ballet class and Mum is not available on her mobile phone? DRAMA with a snarky voicemail message to boot. Sister asks you to please move over a bit on the couch? DRAMA.

For the love of god, these children of mine are doing my head in. They might like to use the word "chillax" but seem to have no idea of how to chillax themselves - everything seems to end up in a long, drawn out, whiny voiced dramatic episode. Me being me, responding to DD2 (because she
is Queen Drama Numero Uno) in the same whiny spoiled, the world-has-wronged-me tone of voice she talks to me in really only infuriates her further. Which kinda makes me laugh. Which just makes her more pissed off than EVAH !! and so she storms up to her room to whinge and cry ... which of course means EPIC WIN for me because she and her attitude are out of my immediate vicinity.

(and I'm pretty sure women my age should not be using the word "epic"...but there you go.)

Yep, I'm pretty sure that sound was the sound of The Mother of The Year Award going down the drain. Again. Damn!

The only good part about having precocious kids is that I live in hope that this means by the time they are 13, it's all over. For most parents the teenage crap is from around 13-15, but since we're getting a head start on all of this, I'm thinking that by 13 I am free from it all. Stop laughing! My logic works, doesn't it? Ahhh but then maybe there's the rub - who ever said anything about teenagers was logical in the first place? *big sigh* What makes this harder is that I tend to parent with a pretty hefty overtone of sarcasm even on a good day...which, speaking from experience here, only results in pissing already snarky kids off even further. I don't know why they don't love it when you imitate them, but then maybe they temporarily forgot just how much fun the repeating game really is?!

At nearly ten years old, drama queen teenager-ish moody hormone crap is not really what I thought I'd be dealing with....but then the very IDEA of my kids actually being ten years old (and where, exactly, did that time go?!) moves me to tears. Damn. Now who is being all about the drama?

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