Stay At Home Parents

There is no way in the known universe that I would be capable of being a stay-at-home parent. This of course goes back to the fact that my personality is just not particularly maternal. On a more basic level, I just can't cope - with the mess, the noise, the need for constant entertainment (theirs and mine), and all the things that go along with staying at home with kids. It goes without saying that I adore my kids, but I don't adore playgroups with bitchy women, doing housework of any kind, coming up with crafts for the kids to do, and in general being a one woman summer camp. I totally admire these women who stay at home with their kids - of differing ages, usually - and adore every minute of it. The kids whose first taste of organised care is when they go to Kindergarten. The parents who really were there for every moment of their children's young lives. I tried to be a SAHM (stay at home Mom) but failed dismally. I enjoyed the time I had with them, but enjoyed it far more when I worked part time and didn't see them all the time. Did I ever feel like I was missing out? Yes, sometimes. It stabbed another dagger through my heart when the nanny or MIL told me of some milestone they had reached when I wasn't there. Do I feel that they missed out on something? No, quite the opposite. They aren't going to remember if I was there for their first 'gaa gaa' but they will remember having a happy, mostly calm, well adjusted mother. If I had been home with them 24/7, they would have had a harried, stressed out, highly irritable mother. I think the worst enemies of mothers in the world today are ... other mothers. The ones that judge you if you: work, choose not to breast feed, don't go all organic, use pacifiers...you get the idea. At the end of the day the best parent is the one who ensures their child is fed, warm, clean, and happy. If you do that via a bottle and a pacifier, SO BE IT. It doesn't matter, really, how you do it, as long as you do it. Parents, let's be more kind to one another. We're all in this together, raising the next generation.