You and Your Mama

DD1 looks a lot like me - she's the one that everyone says comes from my side of the family. In addition to being really tall, she has been blessed (cursed?) with my big ol' wide nose and slightly manic personality. Other than the colour of her eyes, she really does look a lot like me. Yesterday she commented that she has never seen a photo of me as a little girl - and she was very curious to know what I looked like back then. So I gave her the most honest answer I could, which was, "Well, just imagine what you look like, then put in blue eyes and be fat."

Nothing like a bit o' honesty, right? For what it's worth, DD1 is a total beanpole. So she's what I think I would look like if I were skinney.

...and then I was perusing the time-suck which is facebook, and I noticed that my neice looks so much like her Mom (my sister.) There are some expressions she makes which are just SO much like my sister, it's wierd and wonderful all at once.

...and then a few nights ago I found myself eating a midnight snack of a cup of sweet milky Elite coffee with a piece of toast covered in cream cheese and strawberry jam. No prizes to those who guessed that the aforementioned snack is one of my Mom's favourites.

...and then, I commented to my sister about us suffering from FNS. FNS = fat neck syndrome. For reasons nobody can explain, all the women in my family suffer from, well, fat necks. Even in those fleeting moments when we are skinney, we have fat necks. Random doctors in the street have stopped me to ask if I've had my thyroid checked lately. Little do they know that I've found myself wishing for a thyroid disorder so I could take some pills and magically lose 100 pounds. My own GP asks me, at EVERY check up, if I've had a thyroid test. My answer is always the same, "No. I just have a fat neck. Get over it." Sadly, I have my Mom to thank for that. (Don't worry Mom, I got lots of good things from you, too. Don't read this and get all brogez with me.)

It's interesting, the whole mother/daughter relationship and the traits we share. Whether we like it or not, we take on some of he traits of our mothers - even if we vow never to be like them, it's almost as though we have no choice. Even those people who claim they are NOTHING like their parents will eventaully find themselves doing or saying things which their parents said and did. I can see my own daughters already taking on traits of mine (carb addiction, anyone?). I wish I could pick and choose the parts of me which will eventually come to pass in them, but life doesn't work that way. If I could pick the traits they got, I'd pick:

- An ability to laugh at the most inappropriate moments. You would be surprised how many difficult situations can be diffused with a well-placed bout of hysteria

- A fantastic turn of phrase and love affair with the English language

- The ability to have extended, in depth conversations with absolute strangers ... and then leave that conversation feeling as though both of you have learned something*

- A deep and lasting affection for baked goods

- The ability to feed a family on only the scraps in the bottom of the fridge and the back of the pantry

....and a myriad other parts of me which I think are worth preserving for future generations. So, dear readers, tell me what legacy your Mom left you (fat necks included) and/or what traits you would like to leave your own daughters.

My Mom emailed me and told me that I have to set the record straight: a) my big ass comes from her side of the family, my big neck from my Dad's side. Great! Buggered from both sides! Nnniiiiccceee.
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* Case in point: last weekend DH & I went to Sydney for a wedding. On the plane home I was sitting next to this old guy, and I noticed that everyone who walked past him said, "Good game, mate, good game." I asked him why and it turns out he is the president of the Geelong Football Club. Not only that, he's been president for 10 years, owns and operates the bigest fruit & vegetable supply company in Australia, and is a father to 8 daughters and has 18 grandchildren. He and I got on famously and both enjoyed the conversation enormously - I think we were both sad to land in Melbourne! I only learned on my return that this guy is really bloody famous, and apparently I am the only person in Victoria not to know who the hell he was. BTW, he's much more handsome in real life than in that terrible photo.